


Elizabeth and Leicester

by NCISVILLE



Category: Victoria (TV)
Genre: 1x03 Scene Fix, AKA the scene that didn't happen after the dance that should have happened, Companionship, F/M, First Kiss, Leicester and Queen Elizabeth parallels, Vicbourne
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-17
Updated: 2016-09-17
Packaged: 2018-08-15 11:03:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8053834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NCISVILLE/pseuds/NCISVILLE
Summary: He has one last chance to act before he loses her forever. This time he's not going to let it go. Brocket Hall alternative ending. 1x03 the costume ball scene fix.





	Elizabeth and Leicester

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to deancasisendgame for giving me the prompt. Sorry it took so long, I wanted to make it as close to perfect as I could. Hope I managed to get them right.

Elizabeth and Leicester

 

He exhaled and looked himself over in the mirror adjusting the feather just a bit to the right. Lord Melbourne was nervous and rightly so after the emotional duress he’d put himself and Victoria through. Would she still want him to be around? He hoped dressing up at Leicester would help her understand his true feelings and understand why he’d said those words to her earlier. The orchids were another attempt at that and he only hoped Lady Emma would see them and be able to explain its’ significance. Then again…it could go without explanation and just be flowers sitting on her dresser. He could only hope their message was received as intended. 

Upon arrival at the ball he made his way straight to the ballroom and smiled upon first glance at Victoria. She looked absolutely breath taking and even more beautiful than the actual Queen Elizabeth. It was blasphemy he knew but no one had to know of his thoughts. He made his way to the corner of the room to try and remain un-noticed for a while, but like Victoria, his presence could not be entirely disguised. Emma quickly noticed and came to stand by him. 

“I hope the Queen has saved a dance for you…Leicester.” She said with a knowing smile. 

“She’s busy tonight.” He replied simply ignoring Emma’s last comment, his lips turning up at the corner as he turned back to watch Victoria dance. 

“She will have to marry one day William.” Emma cautioned, a warning in her tone for him to act quickly. She must have seen the flowers then. The reminder sent his mood crashing and his heart began to throb again at how he had hurt her and himself when he lied. He wasn’t a rook for his wife, but he was for her. She’d captured his heart so swiftly with her innocence and kindness. She looked to him for happiness and for comfort and he all too willingly would give it to her every time. 

“Yes. She will, I just hope her husband will appreciate her.” Knowing Emma would continue on the conversation and somehow drag out from him his affections for Victoria he walked away in an attempt to preserve his heart from further pain. 

For a while he hid away in another part of the ballroom and just watched Victoria dance as he tried to come to terms with what would soon be his future. Life as a companion, not allowed to publicly show his love, confined to only private affections. But it worked for Robert Dudley so he could make it work too. Even if publicly they had to keep up the pretense of Prime Minister and Queen, in private they could be together like their hearts longed to. He wondered how the Earl had managed to keep up such a pretense for fifty years. Was he ever tempted to kiss her in public or shower his Queen with declarations of her captivating beauty and his inconsolable desire for her? Melbourne was so lost in his thoughts, contemplating his future that he didn’t notice Emma sit beside him where he’d managed to stay hidden most of the night. 

“Are you going to keep sitting her all night lost in your head or are you going to dance with her like you both want to?” 

He huffed out a laugh and looked to her with a small smile. “Are you going to keep asking me all night until I do?” 

“I only ask because I care William…for both of you. Why did you lie to Victoria about still caring for your wife?” She inquired, curiously looking at him. 

He averted his eyes and looked back to the dancefloor to find Victoria had left, presumably to get away from prying eyes. When he remained silent Emma spoke again. 

“I saw the flowers William…and here you are dressed as the late Queen’s lover. Why did you tell her you don’t love her?” 

“Things aren’t as simple as you make them to be Emma.” Melbourne replied meeting her eyes and holding her gaze for a moment before dropping his eyes again. “There are more important things at stake here than my own desires.” 

“Like the Queen’s? So tell me…how does lying to her and breaking her heart fit into this idea you have in your head?” 

“It…it’s for her own good.” He explained weakly. 

“For her…or King Leopold’s and every other man here who wants to see her married off?” 

Unable to answer he remained silent and looked at his hands. 

“Go to her, dance with the Queen, tell her how you really feel William. Just because you cannot marry does not mean you have to stay away. It may very well be forbidden but our hearts cannot so easily be tamed and changed. Having her heart is better than nothing at all, but if you do not tell her how you feel then you will watch as she gives her heart to another and forever live with the anguish of knowing you could have had her in some capacity rather than none at all.” 

“Thank you for your counsel Lady Emma. I shall think on your words.” He replied non-committedly. 

“See that you do William. She will not wait on your forever.” Emma gave his hand a pat before getting up from her spot to go find Victoria. 

After he was left alone once more he got up from his position and sought out a glass of brandy to help calm the turmoil within. He found it often helped to dull the roar of his emotions to more manageable levels. Concealment was easy most days as he’d had years of practice to do so but Victoria managed to unwind him in ways no other woman had. 

With drink now in his veins the ache in his heart had grown dull enough to be able to stir up those emotions by dancing with the woman he was undoubtedly a rook for. He watched her walk into the room a few minutes later and after passing by her Uncle and George began to make his way towards her. She was so beautiful, so heart wrenchingly regal and graceful despite the way she’d just been talked about and the alcohol in him pointed out how even in costume she managed to outshine every other person in the room. 

“May I have the pleasure ma’am?” He asked when he’d finally gotten close enough to her, his presence still yet undetected. 

She turned to look at him and he could see the hurt she tried to hide in her eyes. He’d done that. He’d hurt her, made her heart ache. 

She looked to her dance card in a pretense of civility and replied, “I think this one is free.” 

He took a step closer and took her in his arms, gracefully beginning to lead them on the floor. Dancing with her made everything feel right even if she kept quiet. He knew she was wounded and trying to appear fine for the sake of keeping her heart intact. Silence enveloped them as they swayed and he knew he would have to be the one to begin the conversation. 

“Have you danced with George yet?”

“He wants to dance with a Queen…not necessarily with me.” 

“Then he’s more of a fool than I suspected.” Silence followed them for a moment before Victoria changed the topic to the one they both had running through their minds since the start of the night. 

“I wasn’t sure if I would dance with you tonight.”

“It would be unkind for Elizabeth to refuse her Leicester.” He hinted, hoping she would pick up on the metaphor. He watched her eyes for and noticed when she caught his meaning, for her once dull eyes sparked with hope. 

“Leicester was her companion?”

“He was. He did have a wife, but then she died.”

“But even though he was free, he never married?” 

“I think both he and the Queen understood they were not in a position to marry…” He watched her face subtly morph into confusion and wrestle with the concept he was presenting to her. He could see her question directed to him and answered, “whatever their inclination.” 

Her eyes widened slightly then and he could see her heart practically beating out her chest the same way his would have been if not subdued from brandy. Her movements stopped and all she could do was stare at him. He knew if he stayed she would ask more questions but it wasn’t the time nor place for the conversation she wished to have. Slowly he began to step back, eyes never leaving her a second sooner than was appropriate. He felt his eye twitch and inwardly cursed himself. Had he just winked at her? Maybe drinking hadn’t been such a good idea since it seemed his heart had control over his body’s actions rather than the other way around. Turning around he mentally scolded himself and walked to another part of the ballroom. Once again he was so lost in thought that when he heard talking beside him he had to do a double take before realizing that King Leopold was talking to him. Was he really so drunk from one drink? He could usually hold his liquor. 

“I heard my niece made an impromptu visit to Brocket Hall.” 

Clearly Victoria was not as incognito as she suspected. Fearing where this conversation would go and knowing he was in the presence of someone higher in authority he held his hands behind his back in what he hoped was an attempt to seem humble. 

“You’re very well informed Sir.” 

“It seemed to leave her in low spirits.” 

“Perhaps she did not get what she wanted?” 

Melbourne didn’t know if it was the brandy, Leopold’s voice, or the fact the King was bringing up how he’d broke Victoria’s heart, but he found himself extremely irritably and rather than answer directly he took great pleasure in answering, “I could not say.” 

“You should know I have sent for my nephew Albert.” 

The words hit him like ice cold water and instantly sobered him up. There was fire running through his veins now and he moved closer to the King, authority be damned. “Without the Queen’s permission?” 

“The sooner he comes the better. Young girls head can be turned so easily.” 

Leopold’s final words were like a dagger to heart. Instantly he was filled with doubt. Was her love for him just that of a passing fancy or did it burn deep like his love for her? Would she be swayed by Albert and forget all about him like yesterday’s news? His heart sunk and when he looked ahead his eyes met Victoria’s who kept her gaze steadfast on him. 

When she was out of sight he retreated from the ball room excusing himself to Leopold before making haste to the balcony. There was no one on the balcony and he thanked heaven that he was alone in the quiet of the night. He looked up to the stars and felt his vision begin to blur. He was falling apart from the inside out and where once strong beverage helped it now ailed him. Would he lose Victoria so easily? Emma was right, she would move on if he did nothing and if this was how he felt at just the notion of Albert coming…how would he feel upon the other man’s arrival? His heart was aching and he felt it clench in his chest and make it hard to breathe. His wife’s betrayal had not physically hurt in this way as Victoria was making him hurt. He wondered why the one did not equate to the other. The only pain greater than what he felt now was the death of his son. He exhaled a shaky breath and gripped the balcony rail tighter in an effort to ground himself. He watched the stars and began to lose track of time as slowly his mind and heart calmed watching the twinkle of the heavens. 

“I thought I might find you here.” Spoke a gentle voice. He spun around quickly, frightened by the sudden noise. He saw Victoria giggle and a smile engulf her features. “My apologies Lord M, I did not mean to frighten you.”

He laughed despite himself and replied, “Not frightened…you just…surprised me.” 

“I see.” She replied playfully, knowing full well she had indeed given him a scare. 

For a moment they just stared into the other’s eyes, smiles on their faces. They both then spoke simultaneously. 

“What did you mean?” Victoria asked.

“Do you truly desire me?” 

They both laughed and spoke in unison. “You go first.” 

Melbourne smiled and said before she could, “You speak first, I insist.” 

Victoria smiled at the humor of the situation before taking a breath and regaining composure. “What did you mean…when we danced? You said whatever their inclination?”

“What do you believe it meant?” He asked. 

“I don’t want to make any assumptions, that’s why I felt it best I ask.” She replied, wringing her hands the same way she had when he broke her heart the first time. 

This time it was his turn to take a breath and gain composure. He had to act now or she would be lost to him forever. “It means that I would love nothing more than to accept your proposal but we are not in a position to marry, no matter our desire to.” 

He heard her breath hitch and watched as she shifted her stance and took a step closer. “You…you…wish to marry…me?”

A small smile crossed his lips and he gave a slight nod of affirmation. “Do you truly desire me ma’am or only the idea of me? Your uncle mentioned to me how easily heads can be turned and I cannot help but think how better suited you would be with someone else…like Albert.”

“Do you think my affections to be so shallow I could be easily swayed by a boy? Lord M, I do not desire a boy but a man. You are the only man I could want to have even if it is confined to that of a companionship rather than marriage.”

“If you’ll have me ma’am I would be content with companionship. Someone told me earlier tonight that having your heart and affections is better than watching you marry another and losing your favor. What I said to you at Brocket Hall, I did not mean.” 

“Then why did you say it if you did not in fact mean it?” 

“I…I believed it way my duty to ensure the continuation of the empire through you marrying so I…I said what I felt I had to in order to see that you moved on.” 

“Even at the expense of your own feelings?” She inquired incredulous. 

“If it meant seeing you with someone you truly deserve…then yes.”

“Why do you believe yourself to be someone less than deserving?” Her tone implied she was hurt by his unbelief in himself. 

“I’m old and not an ideal match for someone so young and beautiful as yourself.” 

“Lord M…you are not old and I find you to be handsome and very desirable and my opinion is the only one that matters here.”

He smiled at that and looked to the sky for a moment. 

“Why do you like the stars so much?” Victoria asked curiously. 

“Of everything in my life they have never changed, they continue to shine brightly throughout time. Though my life may be fleeting their light is eternal and I guess it gives me comfort knowing that there is something that lasts so long. Sometimes love lasts like the stars.” 

Victoria smiled at that and took his hand. “Then let us base our companionship on that of the rooks and stars.” 

Melbourne returned her smile and met her eyes, his heart swollen two sizes. “Eternal and bright.” He brushed his fingertips across her lips, his gaze flitting to them briefly. 

“I love you…Lord M.” 

“I do as well ma’am. I have for some time now.” He answered slowly closing the space between them. 

“Will you say the words for me?” She whispered, her breath now on his chin. 

“I love you Victoria.” He uttered softly, his eyes boring into hers. 

Victoria was the one to push her lips to his, accidentally capturing them with more force than was intended. It was her first kiss and he didn’t expect it to be perfect. He would teach her with time and soon she would be an expert on the matter. What she lacked in knowledge she made up for in passion and desire. He chuckled into the kiss and pulled back. 

“Did I do it wrong?” She asked. 

“No, not at all. Just a little more forceful than I expected from someone so usually gentle.” 

Even in the dim moonlight he could see her blush and smiled caressing her face in one of his hands. “You’ll get better the more we do it. Let me teach you.” He pressed his lips gently to hers cupping her face with both hands, slowly moving his lips against hers. She let herself mold under his influence, slowly becoming undone by his tenderness and gentle attentiveness. When he pulled away he watched her eyes flutter open in awe. 

“I think I should like to learn this skill from you every day.” 

Melbourne chuckled and pecked her lips softly once more. “I do not think we would be granted such privacy every day, lest someone see us.” 

“I would not mind if it was to make to me feel as I do now.” She said in her blissful haze. 

“Companions were not allowed such public affections.” He informed with an amused turn up of his lips. 

“Oh.” She replied crestfallen. 

“We will figure it out ma’am, do not worry about it. Leicester and Elizabeth found a way.” 

She smiled at that but her smile formed into that of a yawn. “My apologies.” 

“It’s quite alright. I believe it is time for you to retire ma’am. You’ve had a full day.”

“Will I see you tomorrow?”

“I shall be around for our ride out after breakfast.” He confirmed. 

“Then I look forward to seeing you tomorrow my dearest companion.” She replied. He bowed and watched her leave the balcony to retire for the night. Smiling Melbourne looked up to the stars. He’d been given a second chance and he would not let it go. He would let his love shine bright like the stars, and together they would be rooks.


End file.
